I made this for me to ramble. I guess you could call it my online journal...which when you really get down to it is what a blog is supposed to be isn't it?
So i guess what'll happen is from time to time i'l reflect on my life and what's going through my head, or heart that day.
I suppose i ought to start off with an introduction to me, but since i'm writing this for me, and i don't even know who i am, that seems pointless.
Right now i'm supposed to be working on my last paper for finals.
Yep. Tomorrows my last day of my first semester of college. Crazy.
The weirdest thing is that even though i'm done with this semester i still feel so incomplete.
M work has been ok, better than i thought i would be, but i still feel like i haven't accomplished what i wanted to.
I wanted to make lifelong friends, have people i could hang out with, eat with in the caf, hell maybe even form something stronger than friendship with one.
I wanted to go to parties to be that "It girl" that i think inside at some time or another every girl wants to be.
Yet, i've been so incredibly anti-social. Yeah i have friends that i talk to inside of class but never out of it.
That's not to say i haven't had some crazy college experiences this semester. My first month here was kinda insane. I went a little crazy, just because i could. And a lot of that had to do with getting over the reason that if i'm honest with myself, i came here for.
Today, a kid from one of my classes said he'd definitely look for me next semester. He said he liked being around me because i was always so happy for no reason.
and my instinctive reply was to say that in fact, i'm one of the least happy people i know.
but of course being me i had to say it while laughing.
If these are supposed to be the best years of my life..... why do i still feel so.... disconnected, and wrong??
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